Tumblr giveaway. Must be following me. Everyone is winner. Everyone gets to follow me. My posts are prizes. Enjoy blog friends.
my last word will probably be either “whoops” or “shit”
im going to find a way to delete every picture of me that has ever existed except for this one and then im going to fake my own death in a really shocking way so that it makes national news and then media outlets will have no pictures of me besides this one to use causing this picture to be on televisions and newspapers across the nation
pro tip: tell the police “lol jk” after committing a crime and you are legally unarrestable
what do you mean people born in 1997 arent 3
sometimes i get sad but then i think about all the fuckin swag i have and everything is alright again
one day i’m going to wake up really fit and attractive and you will all be sad you didn’t flirt with me earlier
when you wake up from a particularly disturbing dream and just stare at the ceiling for a while like what crevice of my mind did that even seep from
all you are is living proof that your parents had sex.